Several months ago the city’s only library with an express elevator expressly invited members to bring their housebroken and well behaved dogs with them if doing so would be the difference between visiting or not visiting the library. Or not. We actually weren’t as interested in seeing the members as we were seeing the well behaved housebroken dogs. To our great disappointment the only dog to have visited the eleventh floor since that sweeping policy change – or sweeping articulation of not actually change since there had never been a ruling against dogs in the 173 years of the agreeably tolerant years of Mercantile existence but lets make it sweeping articulation of a policy that goes against the local tendency to lump dogs in with bicycles amongst articles and lifeforms excluded from bars, bakeries, ice cream shops, public libraries, and Fountain Square- was the microscopic Chihuahua smuggled into the reading room in the handbag of an applicant who after plunking down her $45 U.S. asked if the wee feller were welcome. We know there are dogs downtown. We have seen the caterer walking his dog and the erstwhile music critic walking his dog and we know that one of our directors and his wife are devoted to the dog they keep in their flat in Lytle Park, but none of those dogs has made it onto that wonderful express elevator. We have to wonder. Is it that the dogs are not housebroken? Are they ankle biters? Or has Ed Scripsi repeated the Executive Director’s clumsy but harmless jests about Bichons Frises? He was just joking. Really. He has assured this blogger that all breeds are welcome. All. Except Weimaraners. Weimaraners are the devil.